(brene lookin kinda young here???) this looks like its from the early 2000’s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ck6atQ6xppc
kris notes
We’re going through our lives, and our families at work, believing that we are not enough. This is a serious problem.
Perfectionism is this idea, or belief that if we look perfect, live perfect, and do it perfectly, that we can avoid, or minimize feelings of shame, vulnerability, and judgement.
Brene is a storyteller researcher! Or researcher storyteller?? Which one sounds cooler? That’s what she is.
We are cognitively, emotionally, spiritually, physically hard wired to experience long and belonging, and when we don’t, we BREAK.
It’s time to FEEL ENOUGH!!
Often times in our lives, we try to combat not being enough by PLEASING, PERFORMING, AND PERFECTING. We go through our lives trying to be who we think we’re supposed to be, doing and saying what we think people want to hear, putting on whatever mask or face we need to put on for that moment. What this does, is leave us EXHAUSTED. This is abundantly clear for me. This one hits me hard.
When we’re pleasing, perfecting, and performing, we end up saying YES a lot when we really mean NO. We also end up saying NO when what we really mean is HELL YEAAAA!!!!! I wanna do that!! We don’t have these boundaries when we don’t feel like we’re worthy enough.
When someone asks us to do something, we should really take a moment to think it through before speaking. We should choose discomfort over resentment. Its better to say NO and feel uncomfortable, than YES, and end up resenting the person asking, or the situation you’re now in.
I WANT COOKIES!!!! COOKIE MONSTER!!!!!! Yum yumyumyum!!
WELL OKAY THEN, LETS EAT SOME COOKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
How do we do things without resentment? It takes BOUNDARIES.
We need to have the courage to be imperfect, to be vulnerable.
The whole idea of “I am enough”…. Starts with…… ENOUGH!
Make a list of what you want…. You achievement list.
Now make a list of everything that is happening in your life when you feel REALLY JOYFUL. Not a WANT list, but like what is actually happening in your life when you are the most joyous. Like you’re the happiest when what is happening?
Its very common for this 2nd list to be very opposite of the WANT list. The want list usually consists of WORKING MORE TO MAKE MORE MONEY, and the joy list usually consists of LESS WORK and MORE TIME.
Heres the part where we ALL STRUGGLE: Worthiness does not have pre-requisites. We need to find a way to engage with the world from a place of worthiness. We need to find a way to say to ourselves: “I am enough”, “This is who I am”, because BRENE LITERALLY BELIEVES……….wait for it…….wait for it…….
THAT OUR LIVES DEPEND ON IT! Woo! OH YEAAAAAAAAAAA
