Yea so apparently now my mom is accusing me of doing alot of drugs lately because of my “mood swings” whatever… if she wasnt so fucking stupid she would see the real reason why im always pissed at her/ this house. Its times like these where I just want to knock some fucking sense into my mom and just yell like shit at her to make her understand how fucking stupid she is but instead I just go back to my room and blare the music. This is the 2nd time shes accused me of this shit in the past few months. As days go by I begin to be ashamed of this family more and more. I mean what the FUCK can I look forward to if all I see is death and stupidity in this family? I mean am I the only person that acctually is SMART enough to see that college WAS and IS the way? While almost every other adult in my family didnt go to college, its kind of easy to see the results….everyone is practically living shitty lives and putting their CHILDREN through shitty lives on the way through. I mean I would SERIOUSLY like to relive this life without experiencing all of the fucked up things that took place. I mean how the fuck can I go to school in 6th grade and forget that my mom tried to commit suicide, or how the fuck can I go in 7th-8th when she tried to do the same fucking thing. I mean how the FUCK can someone care enough on schoolwork during these times? or how about 9th when my freakin dad died…….10th was practically the best year for nothing shitty… or should I say really really bad to happen…. oh throughout this whole time my mom was basically unemployed cuz she didnt feel like working because she was depressed. 4/4/05
